A paragraph taken from Stephen R. Covey's book, The 7 Habits of Highly Effective People:
"Each of us tends to think we see things as they are, that we are objective. But this is not the case. We see the world, not as it is, but as we are-or, as we are conditioned to see it. When we open our mouths to describe what we see, we in effect describe ourselves, our perceptions, our paradigms**, When other people disagree with us, we immediately think something is wrong with them. But, the demonstration* shows, sincere, clearheaded people see things differently, each looking through the unique lens of experiences."
**Paradigm is a dimension, perspective, frame of reference or assumption. (For our benefit, I just want some of you to really understand what I'm talking about.)
*Demonstration in the book was 3 very similar photos. One of them is a very different from the other two but pretty similar in a different perspective. What I'm showing you now is one of the two similar photos. I can't find the other two online and I wouldn't mind scanning from the book but I don't feel like doing that.
This is one of my favorite parts in the book. I was quick to find this very amusing, partly because this is a very frequent incident for me. It happens to me a lot. For instance, I lived almost all my life in Singapore, then I moved away and changed. Some people may view me as someone who has forgotten where I came from and who I really am. They'd tell me that I can't runaway from being me. That's another thing very amusing. How about considering me as someone very adaptive and a goal-oriented individual? :P Err. For one thing obviously I'm growing up. Another point I have to make here, people. There's no running away here from myself. I can't stay young, crappy and don't know what to do with her life kind of person. I'm already at a stage weird enough for me, forcing me to blossom into a more responsible working adult. My whining and constant procrastinating can't get me any money to pay my rent, motorcycle, insurances, wedding, house and school. -_- And as for me, I have realized that people have their own paradigms. If we become more aware of our paradigms which are the source of our attitude and behaviors towards things around us and also the most powerful influence, it will affect the way we act towards other people differently and broaden up the spectrum.
This is probably more of a detail explanation of our daily defensive quotes like "They just don't know me that well!", "Fuck them and ignore them all!" or "They're just trying to make you miserable!"
In fact, the barrier between people is, in the layman's term, understanding. Don't you think so too?
I'm too lazy to proof-read this. So. Just to let you know.
Labels: Quotes